>Fire Extinguisher Graveyard

>Remember January 4th rant about the charade I went thru to get an old fire extinguisher left right by my living room window properly taken care of by equally proper authorities ?

Well , I thought it was a done deal and that I did my rare boy scout act by saving
some curious brat’s fingers or pecker from being blown sky high and making a mess of my living room window in the bargain .
Alas . It wasn’t over . Will these things ever be ?
As I passed by my local fire station on my way to the train station , somethi

ng weird caught my eye . I should have seen it earlier since I pass by that place hundreds of times a year .
But this time I was in no particular hurry and turned my gizmo around and went to check it out .

YESSSS . I found a place I though I would never see inside Tokyo’s 23 wards :
A fire extinguisher graveyard !! And right behind the local fire station too .
It caught my eye because it was just outside the fire station wall but not quite .
Like many things in this country , like tobacco vending machines inserted in pharmacies walls , soapland with typical Korean name like Arirang right next to a Yaki Niku restaurant , the fire extinguisher junk / graveyard was in the yard of a run down house next to the fire station servicing my area . Not hiding from passersby eyes either . Just broken down shards of old red extinguishers and their entrails strewed in a semi-organized bone yard of sorts .
Bits and pieces everywhere . Some of those extinguishers carcasses were used to block the rusty shutter of the place’s garage that had seen better days .
Hell , I though , why it took me more than a week and a lot of shoving and calling while right nearby the very same fire station that so willingly gave me the run about till I got nasty and the bloody sucker got taken way amidst hush , hush like charade ?
All I had to do was go to the fire station and either ” cuddle ” those nose picking schmucks into picking that babe up , or , like in the old days , risk my own hand , take the damned thing and throw it at their feet or ring Tanaka’s old door bell ( Tanaka is the resident there CEO ( I presume , of the ” company ” specialized in tearing the extinguishers apart and leaving them strewed about for ages ) . Better still , play the Itabashian game of sneaking by others places and throw the damned thing , over the wall into the yard early morning and wash my Gaijin hands of the whole affair .
After all , what is another rusty old fire extinguisher amongst dozen others ?
Maybe I DO have a conscience . Maybe I still believe in doing the right thing . Maybe I still think that somewhere in that rotten Itabashi ward office there is some decency left amongst them greedy fat arsed so called public servants and that by playing by the rules of common decency others might just get inspired and do the same . Or maybe I am just an old fashion fool .
No matter what , there was no need for me to go thru all that stressful sham while less than 500 meters from my place the ” Fire Extinguisher Graveyard ” stood there .
Wanna bet that accordingly to the Itabashi ward’s rules of engagement and protocol , TANAKA is the name of one of those fire marshals in that tiny Fire Station ? Better still in the main fire station by the ward office ? Wanna bet too that the Tanaka’s have been getting a regular fat pay check for ages from the Itabashi Fire Headquarters for the ” good deed ” just like the Road and Traffic Safety Authority pays for the empty tents ( out of suckers they finned the season before . Ever wondered why these so called ” Traffic Safety Weeks ” always happen BEFORE company bonuses are paid ? ) where old biddies and their CHONAIKAI good for nothing maggots sit ( if the weather is nice , just now and then drinking tea , beer or sake , bored to death since not much to gossip about anyway , while pretending to keep an eye for road safety infractions twice a year ( Spring and Fall ) ?
Some just have it too damn sweet . If only they pretended hard to care for others instead of being greedy slobs , Itabashi Ward or better still Tokyo , would be a much better place to live .
So , next time you find an old dusty fire extinguisher around your area , first take a walk around your local fire station and you most probably find a ” Graveyard ” like the one I found . Then just step right in and tell them to move their arses and pick the dangerous gizmo ASAP before somebody , you included , gets hurt , and take care of the stupid red tape afterwards for f$%K sake .
Koko dake no hanashi .

>Times Square – The Show Goes On


The Pakistani that supposedly planted that toy bomb was put on a no-fly list and was minutes from flying to freedom according to the yank media. He worked on Wall Street, lived in a posh house, bought a beat down Nissan SUV and got busy making a childish toy bomb, placed the Nissan in a place by the Nam Veteran made in China ” Ah Love New York ” paraphernalia stall, knowing that cameras are all over the area and the nosy Nam Vet snitch was nearby. He then somehow made it into an airplane knowing only too well the cops were onto him. The No-fly crappy list was supposed to stop anybody from flying and as a general rule is updated every 24 hours. From now on Every TWO hours and if any airline is found picking their noses they will be fined.
Money talks folks .
When caught, the Paki seemed to have asked the cops ” Are you NYPD or FBI ? ” meaning that the cops / Feds DIDN’T identify themselves properly. Any Jew shyster can use that during a trial to get his client free in the States but then again the Paki will never be put on trial will he?
Then some government joker said on TV ” We all know that it takes 24 minutes for Jack Bower to catch his prey, in real life 53 hours is very good “. A dumb f$%k joker. Thinking of it all the whole f$%king thing is a bad taste joke. A mediocre publicity stunt. The Paki seemed to have been an educated and loaded sort of ” terrorist “.
Why didn’t he do things with panache? Like ANY proper terrorist, why not commit a suicide attack, against the black Nam Vet or / and the diaper totting Naked Cowboy? Why the rudimental pipe bomb, cheap Nissan SUV? Why leave it with the engine running, a bunch of keys ( where the f%$k did them keys fit anyway? ) and smoke spewing out of that jalopy begging the Nam Vet snitch / cop / fed to ” notice ” the whole sham??
Seems that Paki is singing his heart out without needing to pull his nails out with a pair of pliers or electric shock treatment to his balls.
Barrack Hussein O. Bum boyz must be desperate for sensationalism to have planned the whole show in a hurry and you wanna bet that like the toy bomb totting SUV in the middle of Times Square right by that Nam Vet snitch, a lot more “new evidence ” and a few more escape goats are gonna pop up soon? The Paki who knows, might even be found swinging on his ” high security cell ” hanging from his nose hairs…
Can’t wait for the next episode : will Paki die in his cell or will he get a free ticket to Guantamo Bay or better still get a good boy pat on his head and go free cos he snitched on his friends as it was most probably planned in advance…
The show must go on and Yes We Can !! Or Can We ??

>Times Square Fake Stunt


Yep. THAT Times Square stunt on a Saturday night. F%&king tourists loved it. The bomb was similar to the bombs in London and somewhere else in England – Home made kinda popper. A white male was seen running away from the truck. Too f$%king pat.
A typical ” I love New York ” tees and trinkets stall operating African-American, ” found the van with the engine running and smoke coming out of the 4WD . He is a Nam Veteran. Too fucking pat AGAIN! NYC citizens LOVE these sucker soap operas.
Mr. Nam Veteran will be having dinner with the mayor tonight. Wanna bet a few bucks will change hands and he will get a proper stall right next to the Naked Cowboy??
Wanna bet the Japanese and gooks will be taking pics with him instead of the second generation diapper wearing cowboy? J yellow cabs are going to suck him dry and he is gonna come here for the one eye Jack Iitomo show with Johnnys bum-boy ” persent” logo loser Katori Shingo .
Let’s hope the real terrorists come for him to make it REAL since he was dumb enought to show his mug all over TV.
Broadway shows went right on after delayed curtain call.
The show MUST always go on… YES WE CAN !!!



A man was lying in bed with his new girlfriend in a hotel in the Thai resort of Phuket. After having great sex, she spent the next hour just rubbing his testicles – something she loved to do.

As he was enjoying it, he turned and asked her, “Why do you love doing that?”

“Because”, she replied, “I really miss mine.”

>Tobu lethal express strikes again


No need to go all the way to death forest at the bottom of Mount Fuji to kill thyself…Tobu Tojo furnishes the desperate, a faster but messier than hanging ticket to Hell – TJ the Lethal Express!
Sorry desperate folks , the Lethal Express is off on Sundays . Guess you gotta take it easy before the JUMP .
It trampled to pieces some schmuck that acting in accordance with Itabashi Ward rules of engagement, decided not to wait for the railcrossing
bamboo to lift and tried to cross to the other side of the rails.
There goes another one… The very same rail crossing between Kami Itabashi and Tokiwadai. Time : 8:07 pm on Thursday 29th April 2010.

How the Hell do I know all this since my cage isnt that near the rail tracks? Well as it happens I was crossing from where the accident happened on my way to the Ito Yokado supermarket. The sound of the thump and short screams plus the train conductor hitting the brakes told me all. No way anybody could survive that impact. Not even a fat lard like Sumo wrestler.
Itabashians are a hard bunch. As soon as the train stopped the guy nearest to me on a bicycle murmered rather loud : Mada Ka ? ( again?! ). Within minutes, as the since the staves wouldn’t lift and the bells never stopped ringing, an old geeser very deliberately ducked under the bamboo and ever so slow without hesitating nor saying a word crossed to the other side. Suddenly others did the same. Bicycles, scooters and more people started to cross the rail tracks. It’s as if they knew it would be useless to wait for miracles and the gates to open.
8:22. Finally the fire squad cars and an ambulance passed nearby with sirens at full power. By then my railcrossing was near empty of people except for yours trully and some drunken arse still holding a good sized Sapporo beer can. The cars had gone: they just turned around in good order.
Finally a policeman on his bicycle passed by, took a look at me and the drunk , whispered in his radio and told me to cross the rails cos for a while, no trains were passing. The drunk just sat on the side walk mumbling and the cop got off of his chariot to wait for any other cars to come by and send them to their return point. I continued my short journey to the supermarket just in time to film a panda police car speeding by and in tow with the ” meat wagon ” meaning the coroner’s van.
This simply meant : Another one bit the dust.
Twice a month a person is trampled to bits by the nicknamed Lethal Express that leaves every half hour between 5pm and 8:30 pm from Ikebukuro station towards Saitama ( except Sundays and public holidays ) . That useless murdering piece of crap kills more Itabashians a month than road kills. The ripple effect causes thick congestioning crowds of returning people since it is during rush hour. Tobu won’t stop

the lethal express. No way. What is a few road kill twats, killed like the big rat I found decomposing on the same tracks a couple of years ago, compared to a daily dose of a couple of million yen?
The Lethal Express WILL go on !!
Is it worth a few lives a month to transport hicks back to their shacks and sleeping towns a few minutes faster ?
Tobu Tojo Line used to haul s$it and piss from Edo to the paddies around the Itabashi , Saitama . Ever wondered why the station masters and staff’s uniforms are the color of s$it ? This way the splashing goo from the moving trains stains wouldn’t show from afar . Kikkoman Soy Sauce also used the Tobu to haul their sauce into Edo .
Now , the station attendants better change their uniforms to a mixed color of blood and gore .
S%it happens .
It is true that Itabashians are pig headed and hate to wait too long for the rail crossings lights to stop and the bamboo staff to rise. Almost like Osakans. Both are SEKACHI or impatient when dealing with traffic lights and of course rail road crossings but Tobu Tojo line admin and cleaning crews in tandem with the coroner and cops are getting FAST in cleaning the mess. They went from a slow 30 to 50 minutes ( depending where the bits and pieces flew or the number of road kill in one go ) to a mere 22 minutes it took for the meat wagon and fire truck to wash the blood and gore away. Then it is business as usual . The only big fuss was when a rare brave J cop named Miyamoto tried to help some neurotic old twat from jumping in front of a train in that very same Tobu Tojo Line and got killed. The twat was left unscratched with nothing but ” who am I , where am I selective amnesia ” bout .
Fanfare, school brats, some of them used to flip the bird when ridding two on a bike( futaketsu nori in Japanese ) , to the same cop Miyamoto, an art object was stuck by the koban and even a very low level television soap opera showed at prime time ( J cops as a rule always move in pairs to scared to move alone , I always wondered why Miyamoto’s pal never showed neither on the news nor in the terebi drama ) . I imagine if it was a gaijin and a one legged rascal like yours truly, not as much as a comment on how the rail crossing killed about nine disabled people on wheelchairs ( rest assured, not all in the Tobu Tojo Line perimeter ) annually. Disabled are expendable and thus who gives a flying f$&k?
Wonder if according to the Lethal Express pattern the next one getting it will be in two weeks time from today. Could be earlier because after Golden Week people are dazed and tired from all that razmataz while going visiting GiGi and BaBa in the countryside and had to put up with a 50 kms traffic jam or overbooked bullet trains . Thursday April 29th is a national holiday that used to commemorate the old fart Hirohito Showa Emperor’s birthday. Another one is gonna bite the dust soon and will go on and on till some big shot relative finally gets tramped to death . Useless to say, between the same Kami Itabashi / Oyama area .
KokoDake No Hanashi .